Downloading illegal files is comedy, part III
Posted on March 21st, 2005 by fizzle in Randomness
Mom: eric
fizzle: yeah
Mom: i just got this
Mom: It has come to our attention that you have been using the AOL Instant Messenger Program to share illegal mp3’s and other copyrighted material. It is our wish that you immediately cease and desist these actions. If you fail to do so, you will be contacted by our lawyers for a class-action lawsuit against you and possible criminal charges.
RIAA Rep 521671 (7:13:26 PM): I assure you, this is no laughing matter. We here at the RIAA are asking that you please support your favorite artists by purchasing their music legally. Sharing files is illegal and we have and will prosecute for the sharing of copyrighted material.
We ask that you reply to us in this instant mesasge, that you will discontinue the sharing of illegal files. If you will comply with our requests, please type only the number “1″. If you do not comply, please type only the number “2″.
fizzle: did you reply?
Mom: no
Mom: i had to accept the message and i wish i hadnt
Mom: what is it all about
fizzle: well, it looks like the RIAA has made a boo-boo
Mom: what is the TIAA
fizzle: which sucks, cuz some lady in NJ had to pay like 300k in fines because they made a boo-boo
Mom: RIAA
fizzle: the people who cry about downloading music
Mom: well yeah and you have been downloading on my puter right
fizzle: no, but that said that you were using AIM to share files
Mom: yeah
fizzle: so, even if i had used your computer, it wouldnt have been on aim
Mom: and you havenot been doing that
Mom: ok
Mom: that is just really freaky
Mom: it is freaking me out
fizzle: but i would reply to them, because you could be in serious shit
fizzle: like i said, some lady had to pay a shitload of fines
fizzle: and she never even USED aim, but they had records of her doing it
Mom: so its like big brother is watching me
Mom: i closed out that im
fizzle: so open a new one
fizzle: im serious
Mom: how do i get in touch with them and should we delete that thin you use to copy
Mom: well i dont know there name
fizzle: scroll up to where you pasted it
fizzle: riaa rep 521671
Mom: ok they are there agin
Mom: shoul i answer them
fizzle: i told you yes 5 minutes ago
Mom: i am really getting freaked
fizzle: and you should be
Mom: well i tried and couldnt
fizzle: this is serious shit.
fizzle: if they somehow have records of you sharing files, you could be made to pay up to 25,000 per file
Mom: ok they only want me to reply with a number one or two
Mom: i dont even know how to share files
fizzle: yeah, but if you’d listen
Mom: well they can get in line with the mortgage commpany and the rest of them
fizzle: they dont care, they make errors, but that doesnt matter
Mom: i did listen
fizzle: they’ll put you in jail, thats the difference between them and the mortgage
Mom: but how can they have proof unless somebody else is using my im thing
fizzle: i dont know, but i read a story on yahoo about some 50 year old lady in new jersey that didnt even have aim, and she had to pay them like 300 grand
Mom: should i just type the number or should i respond saying give me a different way to contact you
Mom: well that is bull shit
Mom: she should have hired a lawyer if she didnt even haave it
fizzle: i would just type a number
Mom: so
Mom: i canot do that
fizzle: how can you not do that?
Mom: i would be admitting i shared illegal files
Mom: and i do not admit that
fizzle: well, chances are its just a robot
fizzle: so its just gonna keep bitching at you all night until you type a number
Mom: number one is that i agree to not share illegal files anymore and number 2 is i do not agree to not share
fizzle: yes, i read it.
fizzle: it sounds like they’re giving you a chance, i’d just type 1
Mom: RIAA Rep 521671 (7:29:11 PM): Thank you. Your compliance is welcome and appreciated. We will continue monitoring our systems for any illegal filesharing activity. Please notify us if you have any questions or concerns. Have a nice day.
Mom: so how the hell do i caontact them
fizzle: uhh their site is riaa.org i believe
Mom: ok
fizzle: are you going to write them a strongly worded letter?
[a few minutes later]
fizzle: http://www.negativekarma.net/downloading-illegal-files-is-comedy-part-iii.html
Mom: and why is that posted as something funny
fizzle: ?
Mom: what do you mean ?
fizzle: …
fizzle: i mean what are you talking about
Mom: you sent me to the site where you posted our aim conversation adn it says it is something funny
fizzle: yeah cuz it is
fizzle: CUZ I AM THE RIAA REP!
Tags: aim convos, comedy, downloading illegal files, pranks
